Ever have one of those experiences where you look around to see if maybe there is a hidden camera lurking some where, maybe in the bushes or that man’s lapel or that ladies hat? I had one just this afternoon. Let me say to begin with that you need to put yourself in the mode of a forty-something movie with Laurel and Hardy and Victor McLaughlin and Michele-en having a discussion on the steps of the parish church. Get my drift?
I came out of church on the large parking lot side (a point of reference only, just let it suffice that the large parking lot side is more of the ‘main’ entrance than the front of the church), stopping for just a brief moment to say hi to Joan and Dick Shannon who were waiting for anyone interested in RCIA to ask a question. Joan asked me how my day was, I said my son came down and spent some time with Mom. Dick was not really part of our conversation as a participant, but a more of an observer. I then told Joan that my son changed my toilet seat for me. The two of us celebrated the changing of the seat in proper Mom manner.
Dick, on the other hand, was in a different mode with that pronouncement. He said, “Why didn’t you do it yourself, its simple.” Where by I said “I am a secretary not a Toilet Seat Putter-on-er.” And it was there that this very simple conversation took that, well for want of a better explanation, Hollywood turn.
As Dick went on in his view of the simplicity of changing a toilet seat and the mechanics of the job itself, more of our acquaintances joined us on the tiles outside the church in the sunny California late afternoon. And these innocent participants only heard the last few words of Dick’s discourse on the Toilet Seat Caper. One offered that it was her son that called the person who changed her seat. Another contributed that it was not so very expensive and worth the peace of mind that the seat was securely attached and would not wobble. For a brief moment there was a detour into sons and their wonderful assistance to their Mom’s when Mom needed something as important as the Toilet Seat Changed. The third offered to check into her purse for that nice young man’s number who helped her when she was in need of a Toilet Seat Changed.
It was at this point in this wonderful lively discourse that I just had to step in and set the conversation back on tract. I stepped up, put my hands on the first two ladies shoulders and said “excuse me, I just told Dick my son Changed my Toilet Seat today, not that I needed the Toilet Seat Changed. He believes it is a task that any one of us can do, secretary or not”. To that these sweet ladies snorted and said ” Why should I do that when I have a perfectly good young man who will do it for me and I don’t have to do anything!”
It was at that juncture I saw the better part of valor on my part was a swift and sure exit. I nodded, smiled, waved at Joan, said I would see her on Monday and exited stage left.
Who says comedy is only in the theater?!