Monthly Archives: February 2012

Sunday evening

Just had dinner with Auntie Norma, a sweet woman who gets a bit lost sometimes. It is so endearing to me how she comes to my house, sits at my dinner table and just gets into the whole ambiance of eating with people she loves to be with. There is a simplicity in her that has cut through the bull-pucky of life, well actually Auntie Norma has just sort of jettisoned the bull-pucky, and just enjoys what is in front of her.

She gets a little meandering sometimes, sort of lost in the past because she is really clear about that, but not really disconnected with the present. She is one of God’s Little Ones. She is so very childlike in her view of life right now. How great a teacher she is and just has no clue that she is, she just does.

God bless his Little Ones. And those of us who are privileged to be with them.

 

 

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Best friends

Went to Yoga the other day with my best friend Pat. Dynamic and incredibly limber; not only in body, but mind too. I trust her with everything about me. She knows things about me that even my children don’t know. She is more than just a BFF, she is my mentor, my spiritual guide and the best cook in the Village!!

This is the woman who told my boyfriend and I to get our act together. Not in a Lord-it-over-I-am-so-much-more-than-you; but in the I-love-you-so-much-I-just-have-to-tell-you vein. For it is always love that motivates her. Oh, how I wish I could say that!

She is right, getting our act together is just what we need to do. One can waste so much time being indecisive. You can wake up one morning and find you are twenty years older and lost the opportunity to even be asked to make a decision. When you climb out of the covers of Need-More-Time you find you are completely out of it and completely alone.

I do not want to loose the opportunity to love completely. I do not want to have to wake up one day and find I am sidelined in life for being indecisive. Even a wrong decision is a decision. And there is something about no decision being a decision by default isn’t there? I do not want any one else making my decisions for me. I will take ownership of everyone of them, good, bad and judgment still out.

So, I will pray to God then sit down and have “that talk” with the man I love. And Pat will be probably my first who hears the result. My Best-Friend-in-Christ.

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Some times life just is…

In this place where I live there are a lot of very much older people; people with very hard to live with physical problems along with some of the mental problems that life just produces. I see them, talk to them, pray for them everyday, with the added silent request to God that I can somehow sidestep so much of what I see. My dogs and I have helped more than one oldster back home who went for a walk and just got lost. I listen to those with what I hope is a loving heart who can’t remember they just said that thing and repeat it every three to five minutes. I think to myself, “there, but for the grace of God go I”.

So, it is with a grateful heart I write today. I am not young, but I have good health, can walk the whole mile around The Circle, (which is sometimes more than Da Boys, Yuri and Pepper, my dogs can do); can do Yoga pretty well, though no foot-behind-the-head for me; I can run up and down the stairs at work; carry cones and metal barricades to keep the cars away from the children who come to learn about God and keep them safe: in other words I am still an active participant in life.

My neighbor tells me I am like the energizer bunny, that I am always doing something, not just sitting. My boyfriend says I am a Marine, never giving up on getting that thing done. I am my mother and father’s daughter; if it is messy put it to rights, if it needs to be done no one else can do it like you can. They taught me by example that the very best feeling is when you get a job done well. They also left me with a nudging drive that will not let me just sit, even when I want to.

In this world we live in today my parents would have stood out like a sore thumb. They believed in working for what you want, in having manners and being polite to everyone, in God, in truth, in decency and in the ability of each of us to be the best we can in every circumstance.

I do too, which is why I sort of stick out too. Those finer things of life make it so much more fine. Work is not a disease, it is part of being human. There is nothing more satisfying than working hard to accomplish something and to finish it. It took me ten years of going to college in the evenings to get my AA degree. At the end of those ten years I graduated Cum Laude. I wish my parents had been there see that their girl had learned their lessons well.

So, I guess my neighbor and my boyfriend are right. I am always doing something and my Dad the Marine rubbed off on me. A job well done is a great legacy. Although I think on my headstone it will read: “Did you put that away?”, since that is my lot in life, to put things away, set things to rights, make my corner of the world a tiny bit neater.

Looking out my front windows as I write this I see my lavender gently swaying in the light breeze, sunshine falling across the grass and spilling into my patio. There are things calling to me in their whispering voices to get done, but for right this moment I will take a small pause and say thank you to God for my life, for the parents who gave it to me and taught me to live it the best I can.

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Indomitable Daffodils

I had an “ah ha” moment yesterday while walking puppies. I saw this beautiful group of daffodils that had been assaulted by some trying to stop them from their perennial bloom so gloriously blooming with their yellow glow. These tiny early spring flowers had been dug up (or so some enthusiastic gardener thought), chopped back, run over, ignored and left to fade away and be forgotten.

It made me think of this: I could start a blog and write about what it means to not give up. These flowers are not only growing and surviving, but blooming and spreading their warm yellow glow to any and all who see them.

I am a “Village Person” , I live in a retirement village in the middle of SoCAL where the emphasis is on youth, beauty and the current “in” way to look. I do not fit that view. I am no longer young, but not at the oldster age where I need to watched so I will not wander off in my Focus and drive on sidewalks and not remember where my house is or who you are. I am a surviving member of the Baby Boomer. I still love, laugh, cry, mourn and just generally live life as it comes, even as old age creeps up on me, with its pleasures, pains, sorrows and incredible joys.

There are times when I am startled by what I see in the mirror, especially in the mornings. I get frustrated at my lack of stamina at times, then sit down til it passes. I am wise in the learnings of life but can still fall head over heels in love like the sixteen year old I feel inside. I will stop my car in the middle of the road to save a helpless animal, I will spend every cent I have to save them, then mourn deeply when they are gone.

I have learned that a living, breathing creature is the most valuable item in the universe. I have learned those I love are at the top of my priorities and that the giving of love is the highest form of living I can achieve.

I am just like the indomitable daffodils, after all the punches and kicks and beatings life has dished out to me I still bloom. I will come up just like they do right after the thaw. I will bloom, I will spread my glow of a loving heart to any and all who pass by.

As Pruddy, the sage dog said in her special way, “Live, Laugh, Love”; the rest is just passing. So, when I get to see my Black Pearl again I want to show her I did my best to live up to her example of love.

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